Please Send Snacks

I am sitting at my awesome desk treating myself to an ice cold Dr. Pepper from the fridge. I have about an hour until we all meet for brunch.

I set the alarm on my phone for nine thirty this morning, but Soua got up at seven and then we decided to go to Target. There were only 4 students going to Target with somthing like 5 OLs. It was fun though. I bought a hair dryer, another waste basket for recycling purposes, and a water filter pitcher. Spending money is really starting to suck, and I am beginning to understand all the hype about being a starving college student. I want to buy snack food and fun stuff like that, but my money reserves are ever so slowly depleating. Snack foods will have to wait. From here on out I will exist on cafeteria food alone.

And the occaisional Dr. Pepper.

The idea that I am going to be staying here ALL winter comes in shocking little waves. Like last night when Marrta suggested (or ordered rather) that we stay up all night watching Across the Universe after watching 21 in Christianson center. After 21 I was too tired to even think of doing anything else, and I was bummed because I felt like we wouldn't have another chance... oh... wait... we have until May.

Before coming here, I talked to Nora who is going to the U. Hers, like the statuses of many on facebook, had to do with how terrible orientation week was. She told me it's like summer camp from Hell. In a way I agree. It's not that bad really, and I know it's necessary, but I'm reluctant to put myself out there to meet new people and do anything other than sit around in my room and play with my computer.

Last night in our Neighborhoods Dustin tried to teach us a game called "Wah." I thought it was cool, but it got too dark to play properly.

The speaker was good, though my mind was elsewhere. A lot of what he said was covered in "Real College." I thought it was neat that it takes 30 days to break a habit. That means that I have exactly one month to become a neat person. All my life I have lived a carefree existence. If, by September 30th, my dorm is still clean, I will be a changed person.

I look with sadness at the small pile of clutter already accumulated just inches from my laundry basket.

I tested out the showers today. There's definitely a system that must be developed. It's so hot, and I felt so gross that the shower was amazing. Too bad I'm just going to go back outside and get sweaty and gross again.

Ben and I crossed paths briefly yesterday. After all those excited and/or anxious text messages, you'd think that we'd have more to say to eachother... but I guess not. We can still be friends.

I still haven't seen Jennifer.

Yesterday Marrta's family took us to Target, and then to Lee Ann Chins. It was great. Marrta and I will be great friends. :D I almost texted Sara last night, as Marrta and I were exchanging knowing glances at the sexiness simply eminating from Jim Sturgess, to tell her that she's been replaced.... it's sad though that it has to be a Sara replacement... YOU WILL NEVER BE REPLACED SARA! Marrta actually reminds me more of Visser. It's all good.

My Dr. Pepper was sitting in the sun... it's not ice cold anymore :(

Bit by bit is the reality of my situation sinking in. This morning when Soua woke up, and I too eventually rose, I kept expecting a knock on the door and someone saying, "Girls, time to get up!" When the schedule says, "Target Trip," once again, I expect someone at the door saying, "Lily, Soua, time to go to Target!"

Independence.

On wednesday, no one is going to knock on my door and say, "Lily, time to get up! Modern Civilizations in Forty minutes! Here, let me take you there!" Once again, "independence." It's something I've had all my life, but only now something I'm going to have to use.

Maybe that's something I'd change about this whole Orientation deal. Maybe if things weren't as structured at SOAR, it wouldn't be so strange now. At least now it's some what of a balance between being baby sat, and being on your own. I still need to be at the required sessions, but no one is going to hold my hand to get there... so I COULD skip, but I'd only hurt myself.

I'm wearing a skirt and a tank top because it's SO freaking hot. I want to put on pants though. Despite the fact that I REFUSE to shave my legs, I am still self-concious and fearful of judgment. So much for that aspect of independence, eh?

Now... I think I am going to clean up that small cluttering by my bed (G-double O - D J-O-B) and then write a letter or two.